1.75 Hours

That is how long it takes for Natalie and me to get out the door when Darren's gone. And that allows for zero deviations. So no poopy diapers, no screaming fits, and I can decide on an outfit in less than one minute.

Typically, I allow two hours, and generally we use up every spare minute. I have figured it out in my head that theoretically, we should be able to get out the door in 1 hour and 45 minutes, but somehow it just doesn't happen that way. From waking up, showering, dressing, hair/makeup, coffee, and breakfast, it takes me 45 minutes. So I get up about 50 minutes before Natalie.

It takes Natalie about 30 minutes to eat, but I don't know what else takes so long, because I swear it takes an hour to get her out the door. In any case, I plan on an hour for her. Then I usually throw in an extra 15 minutes, just because things never go as planned.

Some days, I think I should add more extra time just for my ineptitude...

Yesterday morning Darren was gone, so I was by myself getting Natalie up and ready for church. Church starts at 9 am; we need to leave by 8:40 am. I, following "the plan," got up at 6:40 on the dot. Actually I got up at 6:37 because lately Natalie has been waking up at 6:30 for two minutes and going back to sleep. But she fusses enough to wake me up.

So anyway, 6:37 arrived, and I got up and got ready. I woke Natalie up at 7:30. We were driving up the driveway at 8:42. (My 20 minutes of travel time includes extra time, also. Because I'm like that.) So we were fine.

The problem is, I am inept. At life, sometimes. Natalie was fussing on the way to church, so she was distracting me a little bit because I kept looking at her in my mirror and talking to her. And then I looked up and OOPS! There went my exit.

Fail. So all my careful planning, and we were late to church not because I overslept, not because Natalie pooped on her outfit, but because I can't drive.

You can't win them all.